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Dec. 18th, 2011


They say love is worth it.
Worth all the pain. the anger. the tears. the heartache.
But is it?

Are those few moments, days, weeks, months, or maybe even years, worth the nights spent missing him, the sadness knowing that he isn't missing you, the shattering of your heart when you see him with someone else?

I would say they're not. I would say the way I feel now isn't worth it.

Why is it that every time I think I've found love, I find heartbreak?

Nov. 24th, 2011

October '11 Playlist

come on get higher - matt nathanson
little wonders - rob thomas
i never told you - colbie callait
from where you are - lifehouse
to make her love me - rascal flatts
who i am - jessica andrews
confidence - teddy geiger
I'll be - edwin mccain
hanging by a moment - lifehouse
pictures of you - the last goodnight
do i - luke bryan
home - blake shelton
amazed - lonestar
just a kiss - lady antebellum
stupid boy - keith urban
stuck like glue - sugarland
wanted you more - lady antebellum
long gone - lady antebellum
you'll think of me - keith urban
easy - rascal flatts
runaway - love and theft
for the first time - the script
amazed - lonestar
long hot summer - keith urban
here without you - 3 doors down
i'd rather be with you - joshua radin
you found me - the fray
almost lover - fine frenzy
secrets - onerepublic
the only exception - paramore
100 years - five for fighting
apologies - grace potter
broken - seether
ashes and wine - fine frenzy
bloodstream - stateless
as i moved on - blue foundation
find a way - safetysuit
run - snow patrol
hunter - dido
9 crimes - damien rice
king of anything - sara bareilles
she won't be lonely long - clay walker
here comes goodbye - rascal flatts
men don't change - amy dalley
tonight i wanna cry - keith urban
words i couldn't say - rascal flatts
up from below - edward sharpe
you left me - the maine

Writer's Block: An intimate portrait

If someone wrote a book about your life, what would it be called?

Words Unsaid

Writer's Block: Happy Turkey Day!

What are you most thankful for?

My friends and family. No idea what I would do without them

Apr. 19th, 2011

looking to help

If anyone has issues or things that they would like to discuss with someone anonymous who will not judge them but will be there to listen and give advice if necessary, please let me know.
I'm probably going to by a psychology major and I am a good listener and I like helping people so don't be afraid or shy to open up.

Writer's Block: Soul together

If you could have the ability to hear everything your best friend or romantic partner was thinking, but you couldn't switch it off (or tell them), would you want it?

Even though you may hear things that you don't want to hear, wouldn't you want to hear what they really think about you? I would. It would be nice to hear some honestly for once

Writer's Block: You've got the look

How important is physical attraction in selecting a romantic partner?

I think that without being physically attracted to someone, people don't generally have the effort or willingness to get to really know the person.
Though our generation refuses to admit it, attraction between people is usually begun due to some sort of physical appeal.

Writer's Block: Better than leftovers

If you had to eat the same thing for dinner every night for the next year, what would you choose?

tough question....
mac n cheeese
or a pasta of some sort. something that I would give me enough energy
pasta with chicken

Oct. 22nd, 2010


Applying to college is a stressful process. People are constantly bugging you about essays and grades and working hard.
There's a boiling point in the college process. And I think I've hit it way too early.
I don't want this to be another one of those "I hate my parents" posts. I want it to have more meaning than that but seriously recently, i hate my parents.
They don't understand that I truly am doing my best. I go to class, I do my homework, I study for tests. They act as though I am purposefully trying to ruin my future. Wouldn't that make me stupid? Isn't that an insult? Yes.
I know it's bad to wish that your parents were dead. That life would be easier without them. It's a horrible though, a cruel one and I feel bad for feeling like that but I can't stand them, living under the same roof has become unbearable.
I'm going to be one of those people who grow up and never want to have any connection with their family.
Until the age of 14 my parents beat me. Sometimes a mild beating, sometimes more severe. Once my father threw me so hard against a wall that my head made an indent in the wall. I learned to forgive them for that. They stopped after 9th grade but I still get threatened on a regular basis.
I've learned how to be stronger, how to stand up for myself. Now when my father says things like "i should just beat you" or "do you want me to beat you?" my answers are yeah you probably should, or I don't care whatever.
I've finally found the confidence to not care what they think. I've lost respect for them and I don't even love them much.
I just deal with them because they are my parents.
My mom constantly threatens not to pay for my college tuition if I don't get into a top school. I don't think that this is fair. What happened to accepting your children no matter who they were?
My parents aren't rational. They think that they are the smartest people in the entire world. My mother constantly talks about how she is the only rational thinker of all the parents in my school.
Whenever there is a part and the other 239 students get to stay until 3 but I have to leave at 1, I tell her this and she responds saying that none of their parents have brains. There are moments of sanity where I actually think I like my mother but then her true self comes out and those moments of fun or happiness turn into anger and frustration.
I'm no longer a daughter to them. Just a college applicant. Just an object. They don't look at me or think of me as a human anymore. When I'm in the room they talk about me as though I'm not there just to be rude.
For example, my dad will be like "did alexis finish her duke application?" mom: "probably not. you know she doesn't work hard. she's so lazy."
Thanks mom....
Can't stand them. Help me. Can't wait till college. At least they're making transitioning to college easy.

Oct. 16th, 2010


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